Self-confidence. Something i find so hard to acquire sometimes. Other times, i'm quite full of it. The other rest of the days, my tank lays low.
I know how i look like, i'm quite aware that most of the time i look pleasant, not amazingly breath-taking but just pleasant. (Unless i'm at home or i'm preparing a meal - pretty difficult to look polish while doing so.)
But i'm not here to discuss how i look, i'm here to discuss what values i posses and my abilities. Lately i have been feeling a little off, because i have been struggling with the fact that my capabilities are often taken lightly and sometimes not-appreciated. Am i the only one?
A certain basket of goods were laid in front of me, however i decided not to choose it, because i'm way more worthy than that amount offered. And i am honorable. How could i ever accept something less of me. But before coming to that conclusion - i struggled alot with my own head and heart.
I was asking myself if i was only worth so little? What have i been doing wrong, or have i been in a self-denial cloud ? I started to doubt myself, my abilities and capabilities. I almost accepted the offer - which was far from my breaking-point.
After all these thoughts, i was then already burning with fury. Totally struggling with what was happening and just couldn't accept such nonsense. I asked questions, and listened to explanations - but it was all crap. That interview was one of the most boring ones i have ever been in. I just wanted to punch the HR manager's face.
So - i walked away. It's not about getting the job or not. But i was just amazed that it shook me, and my self-confidence. I started to doubt myself. Just because someone else didn't see what i saw in me. And this is bad, NO? Yes it is - i would like to say that my self-confidence doesn't/shouldn't depend on what others think about me. But then again, sometimes only others can see what i can't see.
I should work on this.
I know how i look like, i'm quite aware that most of the time i look pleasant, not amazingly breath-taking but just pleasant. (Unless i'm at home or i'm preparing a meal - pretty difficult to look polish while doing so.)
But i'm not here to discuss how i look, i'm here to discuss what values i posses and my abilities. Lately i have been feeling a little off, because i have been struggling with the fact that my capabilities are often taken lightly and sometimes not-appreciated. Am i the only one?
A certain basket of goods were laid in front of me, however i decided not to choose it, because i'm way more worthy than that amount offered. And i am honorable. How could i ever accept something less of me. But before coming to that conclusion - i struggled alot with my own head and heart.
I was asking myself if i was only worth so little? What have i been doing wrong, or have i been in a self-denial cloud ? I started to doubt myself, my abilities and capabilities. I almost accepted the offer - which was far from my breaking-point.
After all these thoughts, i was then already burning with fury. Totally struggling with what was happening and just couldn't accept such nonsense. I asked questions, and listened to explanations - but it was all crap. That interview was one of the most boring ones i have ever been in. I just wanted to punch the HR manager's face.
So - i walked away. It's not about getting the job or not. But i was just amazed that it shook me, and my self-confidence. I started to doubt myself. Just because someone else didn't see what i saw in me. And this is bad, NO? Yes it is - i would like to say that my self-confidence doesn't/shouldn't depend on what others think about me. But then again, sometimes only others can see what i can't see.
I should work on this.
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